Peanut

The world was so much brighter
when life was on the way.
Politicos choices and slogans
economic crisis,
death, poverty, oppression—
these were all just passing noise.

Everything would get better,
because life was on the way.

Our boy, he’d be special.
We’d raise him to make a difference.
We’d teach him to love,
to respect, to care, to make choices.

Nothing seemed impossible,
when life was on the way.

Our love was never greater,
our hearts were never fuller.
Our joy out shone us, illuminated
paths through dark days.
…because life was on the way.

Now its been thirteen days…
and that little light is gone.

No heart beat to be found,
our hopes, our dreams, our love—
vanish in a cold breath of sterile
doctor’s office air.

Quiet thank yous and goodbyes.
A numb stumbling drive home.
We hold each other and cry,
and painfully wonder why,
no longer, life is on the way.

These days we smile,
we behave accordingly.
We go to work, we say “fine
thanks, how are you?”
But inside we’re still rebuilding,
inside the abscess still heals.

Together and separately we wonder,
whether we can make it through
each day.
Silently we pray, we hope, we fear.

No words spoke nor written
can say,
how much I long and dread for,
life to be on its way.